the jew-do master speaks

Blah blah.
I don't have class until 2 today so I'm just sitting around watching Sweet Sixteen or something. It's like a marathon and the girl who was in USY is co-hosting it.
Ugh, my class today is that stupid Fashion Industry class. I fucking hate it. I'm going to my advisor tomorrow to talk about stuff.
Sighhhh....last night I talked to Abbie for like half an hour and then Susan for like an hour and that made my day happier.

In Design yesterday we painted squares...

Whooo, college.
Eh whatever. I'm here. I love Drexel, hate my major and 2/3 of my classes. The only ones I like are the ones not actually related to Design & Merchandising, which are my honors course (which is all about 9/11) and Design 1 (even though it's like art for dummies - what we're going to do in that class has yet to be established really). I think the problem is, in reality I chose Drexel about three years ago, when I was a junior, and then just stopped thinking about it. The only obstacle I came to was when I got into MassArt and realized Drexel wasn't the only school that was right for me. Have I ever mentioned that getting into MassArt was the proudest thing of my life? I still have the acceptance folder they sent me, still feel that itty bitty twinge of regret now and then.
That scares me a little. I still think Drexel is right, though. It may not be as right as MassArt could have been, but I'll never really know, I guess. So, I hate my major. I don't want to be a fashion designer. In my "Survey of the Fashion Industry" class, my teacher started off with, "Let's get to know each other! We'll go around, everyone say your name, where you're from, and your worst moment in fashion." Oh my G-d I was going to get up and walk out right there.
I'm just really frustrated and stressed out. I'm hopefully going to talk to some kind of advisor or whatever soon. I wonder if anyone else decides to change their major two days into their first term of college. They're going to think I'm an idiot.

Oh boy, here I am at college. Let the good times roll.

I don't know I'm not really feelin it at the moment. Everything's okay, I just...I don't know.
We just made smores over the stovetop, that was fun.

I just need to say, packing WITHOUT a weight limit is extremely difficult. I'm not even kidding. Like, I have no idea what NOT to bring. I'm all packed up now, the van is like completely full. Basically, I have those two huge red suitcases which mom and I bought for England. Then I have a smaller bag which I will use when I come home for the weekend. Those are all filled up with clothes and shoes and coats and such. Then I have my ECRUSY pillowcase, which is filled with sweatshirts. Then I have a medium-sized Delia's bag filled with toiletries, then another medium Delia's bag overflowing with hangers. I have two large plastic bags from Bed, Bath & Beyond, filled with appliancey things (kumkum, lights, etc.) plus my sheets. Then there's my comforter, which has it's own bag. Then there are two pillows, which came in their own plastic doohickeys. There's also a mattress pad which has it's own bag thang. Um....I filled my red bag that I used to carry my laptop to Israel with art supplies. Oh, there's a bedside table which is in a box because it's not put together. There's a small box full of books, and then there's my printer which is in it's own box.

I think...that might be it. It's kind of ridiculous how much I'm bringing. I hope my roommates are bringing tons and tons of stuff too. Our suite may be cluttered but at least it wouldn't all be mine. :-p
Right. So tonight I'm staying up until 3 am because that's when CT Limo is picking us up and taking us to the airport. I'm hoping that getting there at 4:30 am means no crowds. Also no traffic getting there. Wouldn't that be nice? I've got a really tiny suitcase packed, and our passports and tickets are all in order and such. Please let us get through the airport easily. Airports make me want to curl up in a corner and rock back and forth saying, "They will let you out of the country. They will let you out of the country."

Badum-dum.
Right now I'm sitting around on skype talking to Matan. We're both sort of doing our own thing, but that's the beauty of skype, it's free so it doesn't matter how long you talk for.
Today I MUST pack, first for Bermuda and then for school. Blarrrrgh. No it's okay I'm actually happy to pack. It means school is close enough to be real. FINALLY.
Sooo Bermuda. For my birthday, I didnt know what I wanted, so my mom gave me a piece of paper that said, "IOU one shopping spree in Bermuda." So that's what we shall do. We're also going horseback riding, YAY I miss it so much. And swimming around, and also swimming with dolphins! It's going to be so much fun. We're only there for a few days, so we're going to make the most of it. We get back the seventeenth. I've got the eighteenth to get myself together, then we're leaving for Philly the nineteenth. We're staying over in a hotel, then I move in the twentieth. My time slot is sometime between twelve and four. My roommates all have that time slot too, but we signed up for it individually of each other.
So I think I'm going to go shower and start my day of mad packing.

I tried to update earlier today and then I don't know what happened. I think I just forgot and walked away.
So I packed all my...toiletries...which takes up an entire medium-sized bag from Delia's. I also shoved all my jewelry back into my (now) heavy jewelry box. This was all at about five am this morning. I had some trouble getting to sleep last night. As in, I tossed and turned until like four and then I set to work organizing. I also polished a few pieces of jewelry that were looking a bit on the tarnished side. I would have conquered the world but I decided to get back into bed and try to go to sleep again. I was sleeping by six-ish, and I woke up at 11 to check Delia's for my on-call. I didn't have to work, but someone quit so I picked up another shift for Tuesday. So it looks like Tuesday is my last day, not Monday. Whatever, I need the money. And something to do. Kill two birds with one stone!
I should really start pack for school, like real-style. I pretty much have to be packed by the time we leave for Bermuda because we're only going to have a day between Bermuda and Philly. And I want to start packing. I want to get there already, so that I can unpack again and set up a new system of organization for everything I own. I just can't yet because I need things for living. Like my toothbrush, I need that.

Bumming around.

I worked tonight, it was actually pretty fun because, see, I got to do "shipment," which means sit in the back putting security tags on things, which means not dealing with customers, which means no chance for me to screw up! It was supafly. Not that I screw up a lot or anything (anymore) but I feel way safer back there. Plus I get to listen to my iPod. So I did that for the first two hours, then for the last hour the mall was open I wandered around refolding and re-prettyfying things. Then, we got out around ten instead of ten thirty. Plus I got a paycheck. It was lovely.
Then I came home and there was an open bottle of wine on the counter so I enjoyed that for a while. Aaand pretty much I've been watching Scrubs since then.
What did I do before I went to work, as in all day? Um...Jesus, I can't for the life of me remember...I watched Gilmore Girls, I remember that, but that wasn't until five. Clearly I'm subconsciously blocking out any parts of my day in which I am miserably bored. Thanks, subconscious, you really saved me there.
Anyways my head is very heavy right now (yay wine) so I think I'll put it on my pillow, which looks so nice and inviting. Goodnight, world.

Oh man! This is my 400TH POST!!!!
Happy 400th Birthday, blog!!! Whoooooo

Oh MAN this thing is old. I started this blog in like 2004, after Blurty deleted the entirety of my first one. I should really print this all out at some point, for posterity. Preferably at a time when I have a HUGE surfeit of paper. Jeez, 400 posts. :-D

So anyways, today. Um...nothing of interest happened. I cleaned my room up big-style, swept and emptied the garbage and everything. There was like a layer of Sage hair all along where the walls meet the floor. So that's gone. I also beat out the sheepskin thing on the bay window, it was kinda dirty but now it's nice. I, strategically if I do say so myself, beat out the sheepskin BEFORE sweeping, so I could sweep it all away together. What an amazing life I lead.
No seriously I'm dying of boredom. Like, the life is being sucked out of me like the Machine in the Princess Bride (which I just finished reading for the fifty gazillionth time).
Leaving for Bermuda in exactly a week! And Drexel starts in exactly two weeks. I'm excited for Bermuda, in spite of myself. We're only going for about four days, but it should be fun. We're going horseback riding and scuba-ing and shopping and such. And then we'll get home and I'll have one day before we leave for Philly on the 19th. I move in the 20th. Besides the fun-ness that is Bermuda, I'm excited to FINALLY be scheduled again. As in, what are you doing on such-and-such a date? Oh, sorry, I've got plans. PLANS! I'm starting to forget what it feels like to actually have things to do.
Sometimes I'm surprised when people actually read this.

Sitting around. I've already accomplished everything I need to accomplish for the day. For the week actually. And that was to deposit money in the bank.
Sunbathed on the roof for a little while today. Don't you love that word? Sunbathe? It's so literal. Eventually I could feel myself starting to burn, and I was thirsty, so I went inside. It's an amazing day out, though.
So, I figured it out. I don't know if I mentioned this here or not, but after being on kibbutz, when I sit in the backyard I feel closed in a claustrophobic because of the fences. Kibbutz was just low buildings and open spaces. So I figured out that, when I sit on the roof, I feel much better, because I'm above all those things meant to close in and block others out. I can see the horizon again, and the water, and other streets and stuff. Even though there are no fields nearby, I feel better when I sit up there cuz I can see far, like I could on kibbutz.
Last night I had an achievement. See, on iPhoto, I have my Nativ pictures sorted by month. So I was looking through January, and that's where the Gadna pictures are. I was digging through them, and I found that closeup of Matan shooting the M-16. I was just thinking about what a cool picture it was, and then I was like, I'm gonna draw it! So I drew the outlines and the framework and such, worrying about details and shading after. When I was happy with the outlines, I did the shading, then the details on the M-16. I left the face for last because I'm usually horrible at making people look like themselves, and I didn't want to screw up the drawing. But when I did do the face, and it was done, I actually didn't hate it. I was really, really happy with it. And when I showed it to Matan, his reaction made me even happier. I was smiley the rest of the night.
I'd forgotten what it's like to be so happy with a sketch. I think the last time I felt that good about one was at CCY. I'm gonna tell my favorite CCY anecdote now, because it always makes me happy when I think about it.

So my major at CCY was visual arts. To be more specific, 2D visual arts. At the beginning of the summer, my teacher, who was amazing, had us all do a big still life. It was your classic still life, stools and rope strewn all over the place, a bicycle, some old boots. I did mine, hated it. It was genuinely awful. So we continued throughout the summer, I learned a TON of stuff. My final project was horrible because I didn't know what I was trying to do, so for the gallery showing I used some sketches that I'd done throughout the summer. Then, at the very end of the summer, in like, our last class together, my teacher set up the same still life that we'd done five weeks ago. I drew the same parts that I'd drawn before. I didn't love it, but then my teacher got out the first ones we had done. Looking at my first one compared to my second one, I was amazed at the improvement. My teacher said, "I think Aviva wins the prize for most improved." I've never been so happy to be an artist as I was at that moment. It was actually one of the proudest moments of my life.

And this is the longest post ever. Bye!

Ach. Stupid Drexel. It starts (and ends) FAR too late. I need to get out of here. Going to Philly for the weekend was a nice escape. Except now I'm here again, and will be for another ten days or so. Then it's old me again, off to Bermuda for a quick hurrah before school starts. But until then...I have literally nothing to do. My room's as clean as it's ever been. I've nothing to spend money on, nor any money to spend. I have no -

Okay whoa. I'm getting way too emo here. I just have to learn to laugh at my solitude, right? Haha, silly misery, up to your old tricks again. Ten more days isn't so long. In fact, it might even be only nine by now. See how the time passes?

Who am I talking to?

I'm in a good mood. :)

I just got back from Phill-ay, lots of fun times visiting Matan. :-D We bought him a fish! His name is HaMefaked Steve HaGadol, which means Commander Steve the Great. He's a feisty little dude, he gets angry at his reflection a lot and fans himself out, and then we can see his amazing tail. Did I mention his bowl hangs on the wall? It's pretty sweet.
Other than that, we walked around Temple a little bit and ate lots of food and I decorated Matan's wall with pictures. His apartment/dorm thing is pretty cool, he's got a little foyer and his own private room with a shmancy flatscreen tv, bathroom, and kitchenette. It's a pretty sweet setup. Also, the ceiling in his room is like crazy high, and I am in love with high ceilings. It was a nice weekend.
On the train ride home I listened to music for most of the way. The weather was beautiful so it made me happy. I decided to make two new mixes, one called 'Music to Drink Tea To,' and one called 'Music to Drink Coffee To.' I'm going to do that soon.
I was also thinking today (I was getting reminiscient) how is even possible that the nine months of Nativ could pass by? Nine months is such a long time. And yet they flew on so quickly. Why is that?
I miss Israel, can't you tell?